Lately, the devastating news keeps on coming, with unspeakable tragedy in mass shootings in a Buffalo supermarket, and at a Texas elementary school. It can certainly feel hopeless at times, so I wanted to share some thoughts on what we can do to cope, find meaning, and help when we feel overwhelmed by world events and tragedies.
(Updated in May 2022, from an original focus on the invasion of Ukraine).
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Memories of a similar time of overwhelm, in 2001
I’ll never forget waking up on the morning of September 11, 2001, to a beautiful blue sky in Arlington, Virginia, just across the river from Washington, D.C. Having graduated that May, I had wrapped up a summer job a week before and was in the midst of job searching. As I ate breakfast, a houseguest who had been watching CNN called out that a plane had just hit the World Trade Center.
You can imagine the next hour, as I watched with millions of Americans to see a second plane hit, heard about the plane hitting the Pentagon (about a mile away from my apartment). I struggled to get through busy phone lines, to get in touch with friends in New York City to make sure they were okay, to call my family in Rhode Island and let them know that I was okay.
Reckoning
As the chaos subsided and thousands of planes were grounded around the country, I had time to think. I felt an overwhelming numbness, followed by wave after wave of emotions. Anger. Grief. Fear. Sadness. Loneliness.
Among other things, I definitely missed the college community that I had left only a few months before. I missed the faculty, who might have been able to explain what was happening in the world. I missed the campus ministry teams, who could help with grief and with fear. And mostly, I missed the community of people with whom I had grown over the last four years.
Eventually, I figured out what I could do to help others and to help myself. And as we face another overwhelming event, this one far from America’s shores, I wanted to share some of the resources that have helped me in times of unspeakable tragedy.
You may have felt similar feelings in the wake of the George Floyd murder, the human suffering in the wake of Afghanistan withdrawal, or countless numbers of natural disasters. If so, or if you’re feeling lost now, I hope these resources help.
Resources for facing tragedy and conflict
In a tragedy that can make us all feel small and unimportant, small steps toward understanding, giving, and self-care are doubly important. On some level, it’s true that we can’t change the major directions of something like Russia’s invasion of Ukraine (unless you happen to be a head of state). And while you may be angry, hurt, and frustrated by the constant news of shootings in supermarkets, schools, and subways, there’s no magic wand to wave things away. But we each have the opportunity to decide how much or how little engagement we have.
Learn what you can, but know when to stop
To an extent, knowledge gives us power. Knowing more about a situation can help us understand it. But the scale of all-out war is hard to comprehend and even harder to emotionally process. Thousands are dying and millions are suffering, and we shouldn’t by any stretch make this primarily about our own feelings, it’s still important to focus on what we can and cannot impact.
Endlessly #doomscrolling Twitter brings a significant personal toll. And thanks to the way that social media impacts each of us, it runs the risk of equating human suffering with Bachelor rumors or easter eggs in the latest Marvel movie.
When you find yourself in a doomscrolling loop, it’s a good time to put down your phone, drink a glass of water, or go for a walk. When you come back, you’ll be in a better position to think of what you can do possible to do for yourself or for others.
Connect with your communities
If you are emotionally processing what’s going on, chances are your friends are as well. Reach out to someone you haven’t talked to lately–sometimes human connection gives us the energy to move forward. Moving forward might look like figuring out a small way to help those who are suffering. Or it might entail processing and regaining the energy to go on with your day. Sometimes and some days, that’s enough.
If you are a member of a faith community, you may find some comfort there. Pope Francis called on “believers and non-believers to make March 2, Ash Wednesday, a day of prayer and fasting for peace.” Others are gathering to pray or simply to be together.
It can also be helpful to reach out to check in on friends who are black, or have kids. They are likely processing quite a bit right now, and reaching out to offer help–or just to check in with a kind word–goes a long way.
Give where you can
When it comes to something like gun violence in America, you have choices, even if you can’t prevent the tragedies on your own.
- Donate to organizations that are providing relief now. Within hours of the shooting, World Central Kitchen staff and volunteers were on the ground in Uvalde, Texas, providing meals for hundreds of kids who normally rely on school meals for daily nutrition.
- Donate to or volunteer for organizations that are trying to change policies, such as Everytown for Gun Safety or March for our Lives.
- Volunteer for or donate to candidates who will change policies in the ways you prefer.
In the case of Ukraine, several organizations are providing humanitarian aid in Ukriaine, including food, clean water, shelter, and medicine:
- Razom for Ukraine is a Ukrainian organization started in 2014 to empower communities, organizations, and individuals to help Ukraine grow toward democracy and sustainability. During the current invasion, Razom’s Facebook page has become a great source for info on who is working to support Ukrainians and how others can help.
- UNICEF is providing a range of supports for children and families across Ukraine
- Voices of Children is providing psychological and psychosocial supports to kids in Ukraine impacted by the war
- Doctors Without Borders has suspended its regular activities to address HIV, TB, and health care access in Ukraine, but it looking to pivot its teams to emergency response roles.
- Together Rising has committed funds through two partners–Direct Relief and World Jewish Relief–to provide medical supplies, food, and cash, as well as psychological and medical support to Ukrainians.
While the outcome of the Ukraine conflict is unknown at this point, it will certainly produce refugees and other displaced people.
- Refugee organizations like the International Rescue Committee do important work on the ground in and near countries in conflict.
- World Central Kitchen has a 24-hour meal station on the Polish border for familes fleeing Ukraine, and is in the process of setting up a similar post in Romania.
- Lutheran Immigration and Refugee Services help support and settle refugees and asylum-seekers in the United States. While there aren’t Ukrainian refugees entering the United States right now, there are still thousands of Afghans, Syrians, Iraqis and others trying to make new homes here. important work to support displaced people.
If you’re not in a position to give financially at this point, you can always take steps to better the lives of individuals around you by volunteering with local charities and other non-profits.
Whether you choose to give, to connect, or simply to keep yourself putting one foot in front of the other, be well.
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graliontorile
June 16, 2022Very interesting information!Perfect just what I was looking for! “We are shaped and fashioned by what we love.” by Johann von Goethe.